In a matter of speaking, I haven't a clue where to start

I only need just a moment to catch my breath sometimes.  The indifference in who I must live with is stealing my ability to breathe and thrive.  Sleep doesn't come easily, nor does clear thinking in the midst of the deadpan canvas on which this life is painted...

I know what to do.  I just have no clue where to start.

Stuck?  Not stuck?  And how do I go about any of this while in my current state of health?  THAT is a really good question.

By the way, if you're a little confused by my words... just go to Where Fireflies Dream (one of my other blogs) and you'll find some clarification there... by now, I think you guys know how this works, how I tend to write between the blogs.

So now I wonder where I go and what I do to begin healing.  And oh my God, this is going to be a long damn road.  Crap.

Just one more day trying to figure it all out.  No worries--I don't spend all of my time on this.  Only in those precious moments that I have to myself am I able to talk about it, in a matter of speaking.  The word "Talk" being used loosely here.

I need a leg up on this.