The Moving Forward Part

Many people fight their way back from bad experiences, only to find the memories themselves pack a whollop of serious negative mojo.  Far too many quick fixes out there on the internet, all of them which neither fix, nor fix quickly.  Okay, so that last part was redundant.  But you get the picture, I'm sure.  Damage done by abuse, mental or physical, will be your baggage through the rest of your life, and you can thank your abuser(s) for that.  Or not.

Creativity suffers in the dark parts of the mind.  I'm not just talking 'creativity' as in art, but in living.  Actual living.  An adventurous soul that isn't particularly artistic can still be creative.  The drive is the same as with that which artists possess, it's just channeled differently.  When damage is done to someone, real damage, the kind that cuts fast and sinks deep, it simply becomes a part of who and what you are.  Healing can still happen, but the scars remain; permanent, and with a grim reminder of pain.

Eventually, when the healing does come, it's most often rough, ragged, and incomplete.  It's the nature of that pain beast, and we can no more change that outcome than we can change our DNA.  So, we live with it, all of it.  But is that really living?  My take on that is.. no.  So what do people do?  What do "I" do?  Keep trying, because that's really all there is.

"Let it go and move forward."  We've all heard that at one time or another.  But does it really work, that whole 'moving forward' thing?  In my opinion and experience I would have to say both yes, and no.  Contrary to popular belief, that baggage will be with you forever, the question is... how heavy will it be, and will you grow strong enough to barely notice its weight?  I don't know about yours, but mine is seriously heavy.  VERY heavy.

The reality in my life is that the scars are there, always there, and they wreak havoc on everything most of the time.

Abuse... the gift that keeps on giving.